I Seek Refuge in the Dharma

My recent Buddhist reading has caused me to re-evaluate much of my life through a different lens. Even if Buddhism per se doesn't pan out for me, it's always good to re-examine what you're doing with your life to decide if it's working for you or if you need to make some changes. I wouldn't consider myself a full-fledged Buddhist at this point, but I wouldn't rule out the possibility that it could happen. My wife has said that's fine with her as long as I don't give up my job, sell our possessions , and start wearing saffron robes all of the time. I've run into some interesting conflicts between Buddhist thought as I understand it versus my life as I've been living it, which could make for some very interesting blog entries in the future.

I've taken up meditation most mornings before work. That's worked out well, as it puts me in a nice, relaxed frame of mind going into my generally stressful work day. I'd like to do it more regularly, but if I'm running behind in getting ready, something has to give. I haven't been doing it on weekends, even though I really should, because I don't feel the need as much when I'm already relaxed. It'd be better to maintain the practice, though, so I may try to change that. My wife has suggested that meditating after work might be more productive, clearing my head after the day, and she has a good point there. I'm considering doing both, for about 15-20 minutes a session to start.

One measure of how any practice is working for you is whether or not it's improved your life. I have to say that my anger management (sometimes a problem at work, if not much elsewhere) has greatly improved, my relationships with people have been better in general, and I'm flat out happier than I've been in some time. I still get upset about things, but I don't stay upset, and that's the main difference. It's hard to stay overly upset when you remember that everything is ultimately temporary, including yourself.

I'm really curious to see what sort of impact, if any, this is going to have on my creative work. Ethical issues have been a huge component of my writing from the very beginning, so that's not going to change, but I suspect the nature of the ethical dilemmas may subtly shift. Others may not even notice the difference, but I might. I'm looking forward to it.